Category Archives: Sex, aka. pumpy-dumpy!

The purpose of (male) circumcision

(Disclaimer: this post won’t go into much depth on the origins of circumcision. That’s too lengthy a discussion and can be read about on Wiki. My focus is on its purpose in Judaism, which by proxy explains its purpose in Christianity and Islam)

Continue reading The purpose of (male) circumcision

Poem: Fifty Percent

bad-mother-300x213
Photo from, and poem part-inspired, by http://www.asparkstarts.com/bad-parents-stop-ruining-lives/

Yes I am being a judgmental prick

And I don’t business.

Yes I am trying to offend

And I don’t business.

Yes I will make enemies when I don’t really need to

And I don’t business.

This is CPR to the lungs

Of cold hard lifeless facts,

Shining light on my ears’ visions,

Stringing vocal chords to the windpipes

Of what my eyes scream at me.

Wish it weren’t true

But

FIFTY PERCENT OF ALL HUMANS SHOULD NOT BE PARENTS,

INCLUDING MOST OF THOSE WHO ALREADY ARE.

Yes please point out

“You don’t have children.”

Yes please ask

“What right do you have to judge my parenting?”

I could counter by pointing out

I was a child

And I had parents.

What I will do is get to the point:

If you:

  • Let them hear you say “I love you”
  • And “I’m proud of you”,
  • Allow them to play and laugh,
  • Encourage their questions and try to answer,
  • Want them to do better than you
  • In whatever they choose to do,
  • Are willing to teach them about sex
  • Before school, media & porn do,
  • Tell them what they’re doing right as well as wrong,
  • Get involved in their passions & dreams,
  • Make up for when you let them down
  • (Because let’s face it: no-one’s perfect),
  • Teach them how to defend themselves from bullies,
  • Give them a happy childhood
  • So they can have a happy adulthood,

This criticism does not apply.

You are safe.

If you:

  • Blame your newborn daughter for stealing your man,
  • Ignore your crying baby so it can learn independence,
  • Find breastfeeding shameful in public and in private,
  • Had kids just because your parents wanted grandchildren,
  • Or your culture or religion said that’s your duty,
  • Or your friends are having them,
  • Or had them against your will,
  • Disown your kids for not following the god you believe in,
  • Believe they’re born in sin,
  • Believe their genitals need ‘reshaping’,
  • Teach your daughter to shut up and take it,
  • Say a child who was disowned or beaten or raped by a parent
  • Was being difficult or needs to understand the parent’s point of view,
  • Smoke, drink or do drugs during pregnancy,
  • Walk out on them because you didn’t get on with the ex,
  • Think it’s the school’s job to teach them not yours,
  • Think more expensive schools = better education
  • Or money & gifts make up for your absence,
  • Beat your kid for speaking to elders or looking them in the eye,
  • Beat them to toughen them up,
  • Would rescue your baby from a building on fire
  • And leave someone else’s to burn,
  • Have kids with someone of a different background
  • So they don’t look too much like you,
  • Think boys should be dominant and girls dominated,
  • Would terminate a foetus on account of its sex,
  • Let them learn about sex from school, media & porn first,
  • Think your son acts unmanly
  • Or your daughter acts unfeminine,
  • Would kill them to protect your honour,

You are a shit parent.

Yes I am condemning

And I did warn you.

Yes I am naming and shaming

And I did warn you.

Yes I am inviting you to hate the fuck out of me

But before you do that

Check yourselves.

What are you guilty of?

What are you guilty of?

What are you guilty of?

 

© One Tawny Stranger, May 2016

REPOST: Inside The Promiscuous Lives Of Kenya’s Elite White Community

Disclaimer: I don’t own these pictures. See the link at the bottom of the page for sources.

Continue reading REPOST: Inside The Promiscuous Lives Of Kenya’s Elite White Community

More insights into misogyny, genitals and general gender relations

A partial continuation of my earlier post on misogynyBased mainly on Tom Hickman’s God’s Doodle: The Life and Times of The Penis, ISBN 9780224095532, and various articles from PsychoHistory

 

I’d always heard misogyny was based on hatred and/ or fear of women. I admit, though I never denied the existence or extent of misogyny, I was sceptical of the hatred part and outright didn’t believe the fear part. I’d never heard of a man who was genuinely afraid of women, I’d always thought it was only about power & wanting to keep it. However, upon reading Hickman’s book I’m just caught between…

 

    

    and…      

  

 

Throughout history men have displayed some WEIRD attitudes and beliefs, not just toward women and the vagina, but even toward their own dicks! No bloody wonder misogyny’s so rampant, and no wonder ignorance of female A&P (anatomy & physiology) went on so long!

 

First, some hilarious and crazy beliefs relating to the genitals (mostly male):

  • In ancient Assyria, it was law that if a woman got into a fight with a man and crushed one of his balls, she’d be punished by having a finger cut off! If she crushed both balls, the punishment was to have both her breasts ripped off
  • Ironically, while the Bible says that if a man’s balls are wounded or his ‘privy member’ removed he won’t go to heaven (Deuteronomy 23:1), Christian men throughout history have been castrating themselves for the sake of God. Examples include the 3rd-century theologian Origen of Alexandria, and a secret sect in 18th-century Russia called the Skoptsy*. In fact, self-castration seems to have originally been part of Christianity and the state of being a eunuch was something of a spiritual ideal, according to Kuelfer

* The Skoptsy are also known for their women cutting off their breasts for the same purpose: they believed sexual lust was a sin. 

  • During the Renaissance, women were afraid that stretching their legs too far or doing vigorous exercise would turn them into men. 
  • Also during the Renaissance, it was believed that all foetuses were originally supposed to be male. Any that were born female had failed to achieve masculine perfection; their bodies didn’t generate enough heat to “thrust” the genitals outward. That came from the ancient Greek physician Galen, who called female genitals mutilated but just guessed God must have had some purpose for that. 

Even now I still can’t work out what that purpose is…

  • In 1993, a woman in Beijing castrated her husband because a fortune teller told her his ‘inadequate’ penis was the cause of their relationship problems. She didn’t do it out of hate, she simply thought it would grow back bigger and better. 
  • In ancient Japan there was a legend of a demon who hid inside a woman’s vagina and bit off her husbands’ dicks. She asked a blacksmith for help so he built a metal penis that the demon broke its teeth on. To this day, that metal penis is remembered in the Shinto festival Kanamara Matsuri. 
  • According to his biographer James H. Jones, Alfred Kinsey (yes, that Kinsey) was well-known for whipping out his bits in front of his staff just because he was so proud of their size – dick and balls. He even used them for his anatomy lessons and demonstrated his personal masturbation techniques. 

I wonder if Granny needs to be shown where the glans is…

On a more serious note, it’s quite possible that misogyny in some instances is a reaction to mother-mediated abuse, similar to post-traumatic slave syndrome or post-traumatic stress disorder. PsychoHistory has a lot to say on the relative ubiquity of child abuse & incest and the somewhat-archetypal killer mother/goddess figure, especially during war. Ironically, while children grow up with negative emotions toward their mothers because of all the abuse (including being used as or sold off to be sex slaves), they still want their attention and approval, even to the extent of dying to defend her from make-believe enemies. Hence war and the concept of “motherland”. 

 

It’s fairly clear that throughout much of (Christian European?) history children were ignored/ abandoned by their fathers and hated by their mothers. Yes that’s right, hated. Women were made to feel their purpose was to just be daughters then wives and mothers and nothing else, and children were yet another encroachment on their energy reserves. Not to mention how few rights women had (ie. it’s likely the children were products of rape), as well as the belief in inherited sin, so children were effectively born to be punished. I’m not claiming that’s the be-all-and-end-all of misogyny, I’m just suggesting it’s a possible factor in some cases.

 

OK, I’m ending this post here. If I don’t I’ll go on for ages! Just a few more weird & funny facts to lighten the mood…

 

  • Throughout history men have feared (yes, feared) women with high sex drives, as if their vulvas were insatiable beasts that would literally eat them alive! Women’s bodies were magical & mysterious enough with periods and pregnancy and whatnot;  why have such strong appetites too? In Lawrence’s Lady Chatterley, Mellors described sleeping with his wife as like having a bird’s beak ripping at him! 
  • Contrary to what people may think, boys can have erections before they’re even born! It happens so often, in fact, that back when he was an obstetrician the sexologist William Masters set himself the challenge of cutting the umbilical cord before the erections happened! 

Why are you telling people I used to be an obstetrician?

  • Ancient Chinese emperors were required to have 121 women in their harems (1 empress, 3 senior consorts, 9 wives, 27 concubines & 81 slaves) – and have sex with all of them over a course of 15 nights! And yes, there was a secretary keeping count! Which meant they had to have damn good self-restraint with climaxing! Why 121? Because they believed it had magic properties and were obsessed with numerical & calendrical order, which meant there was a specific order to sleep with them in: 

Night 1 – empress

Night 2 – all 3 senior consorts

Night 3 – all 9 wives

Night 4 – 9 of the 27 concubines

Night 5 – another 9 concubines

Night 6 – the last 9 concubines

Night 7 – 9 of the 81 slaves

Night 8 – another 9 slaves

Night 9 – another 9 slaves

Night 10 – another 9 slaves

Night 11 – another 9 slaves

Night 12 – another 9 slaves

Night 13 – another 9 slaves

Night 14 – another 9 slaves

Night 15 – the last 9 slaves

(note: The higher-ranking women would be serviced nearer the full moon, when his yang and their yin were strongest)

 

WTF?!?

Scars from The Cruel Cut

Last Wednesday (6/11/13) on Channel 4, at 10:45pm, was a documentary called The Cruel Cut. A moving insight into the practice of FGM (female genital mutilation), it was presented by Leyla Hussein, a British-Somali woman and anti-FGM campaigner.

I nearly didn’t watch it because it was on so late. However, it was well worth it. She explained the different types of FGM*, where it happens, the laws regarding it, and what she does about it. As a victim of it herself, she’s well-placed to do all that. During the program she set up exhibitions where she spread awareness to ordinary members of the public (including videos of it being performed), performed a make-shift survey to members of the public asking them to support FGM**, and even directly emailed the government to ask why anti-FGM laws weren’t being enforced. Unfortunately she got a PC reply saying those laws are enforced and FGM has been successfully stopped in England. What?!?

To make it worse, she and a group of protesters went directly to public health minister’s office (forgot which one. I’ll add when I find it) to speak to her directly. Of course, she didn’t come out to meet them.

* There are 3 types, and I’ll list them from least to most severe. They’re pretty much just as painful as each other (absolutely effing excruciating!) but the latter 2 leave more room for medical complications:

Type 1 – the clitoris is either sliced through the middle or removed, to prevent the girl from experiencing pleasure during sex, 

(there is a variation of this called sunnah-circumcision, in which just the prepuce is removed, making it exactly equivalent to a male circumcision)

Type 2 – same as 1 but the labia minora (inner lips) are also removed and sewn together so when it heals the vagina is completely sealed apart from a pinprick-sized hole that she’s meant to pee & menstruate through,

Type 3 – same as 2 but the labia majora (outer lips) are sealed instead. Both this and Type 2 can lead to menstrual blood and urine pooling inside, fuelling any number of vaginal infections. 

It’s performed as part of culture in many countries in Africa and Asia, and due to migration most other continents. South America seems to have remained free, thank Allah. Among Somalis at least (which seemed to be whom Leyla was most focused on), it’s performed by women: mothers, aunties & grandmothers because they believe it’ll make the victim “clean” for when she gets married, proof of virginity before marriage. This means that when the girl grows up and she wants to have sex with her husband… he’ll have to open her back up. I won’t discuss that any further.

Once again the onus to remain “pure” is put on girls, from an age when they shouldn’t have to know “impurity”, while boys are given license to go amuck.

Men, however, don’t discuss it because as far as they’re concerned it’s women’s business. They usually don’t know how it happens and just go on what the women say – it’ll make them “clean”, it stops them from turning into whores & nymphos, etc. However, when Leyla confronted a group of Somali men to discuss it they were baffled & repulsed. They saw the natural uncut vagina as how Allah made it so it’s wrong for anyone to try to tamper with it. In short, women perform FGM because they think that’s what men want, while men don’t see its purpose and would prefer it to not be done.

And in case anyone thinks it’s a Muslim thing, no. It originated in Kemet (ancient, pre-Islamic, Egypt) and spread all over Africa thousands of years before Islam came to the continent. And it’s practised by many non-Muslim communities, as was evident from her friends who spoke about their experience with FGM (all of them had it done to them) and how it’s affected their lives. Which goes to show that once again culture trumps religion in many parts of the world.

** No that wasn’t a typo. She made a survey asking people to support FGM, just to see if they were politically incorrect enough to refuse. Within half an hour she got 19 signatures, some of them from people who were personally against FGM but felt because it was Leyla’s culture they had no right to criticise. Only one person had the backbone to express outright disgust.

Face palm + tears. 

Another interesting fact about FGM laws: in England it’s banned so the law knows it happens (~24,000 girls a year have it done in England), yet the number of people who’ve been prosecuted for it is exactly ZERO. The rest of Europe is much more no-nonsense, and France routinely examines girls for evidence of the procedure, and if such evidence is found people get their asses locked up.

Related articles:

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-cruel-cut

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2478822/Female-circumcision-campaigner-horrified-shoppers-sign-pro-cutting-petition–theyre-scared-culturally-insensitive.html

http://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2013/nov/07/the-cruel-cut-tv-review

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/london/what-happened-when-antifgm-campaigner-asked-people-in-the-street-to-sign-a-petition-in-favour-of-mutilating-girls-8908877.html

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-cruel-cut