Tag Archives: upbringing

Poem: Fifty Percent

bad-mother-300x213
Photo from, and poem part-inspired, by http://www.asparkstarts.com/bad-parents-stop-ruining-lives/

Yes I am being a judgmental prick

And I don’t business.

Yes I am trying to offend

And I don’t business.

Yes I will make enemies when I don’t really need to

And I don’t business.

This is CPR to the lungs

Of cold hard lifeless facts,

Shining light on my ears’ visions,

Stringing vocal chords to the windpipes

Of what my eyes scream at me.

Wish it weren’t true

But

FIFTY PERCENT OF ALL HUMANS SHOULD NOT BE PARENTS,

INCLUDING MOST OF THOSE WHO ALREADY ARE.

Yes please point out

“You don’t have children.”

Yes please ask

“What right do you have to judge my parenting?”

I could counter by pointing out

I was a child

And I had parents.

What I will do is get to the point:

If you:

  • Let them hear you say “I love you”
  • And “I’m proud of you”,
  • Allow them to play and laugh,
  • Encourage their questions and try to answer,
  • Want them to do better than you
  • In whatever they choose to do,
  • Are willing to teach them about sex
  • Before school, media & porn do,
  • Tell them what they’re doing right as well as wrong,
  • Get involved in their passions & dreams,
  • Make up for when you let them down
  • (Because let’s face it: no-one’s perfect),
  • Teach them how to defend themselves from bullies,
  • Give them a happy childhood
  • So they can have a happy adulthood,

This criticism does not apply.

You are safe.

If you:

  • Blame your newborn daughter for stealing your man,
  • Ignore your crying baby so it can learn independence,
  • Find breastfeeding shameful in public and in private,
  • Had kids just because your parents wanted grandchildren,
  • Or your culture or religion said that’s your duty,
  • Or your friends are having them,
  • Or had them against your will,
  • Disown your kids for not following the god you believe in,
  • Believe they’re born in sin,
  • Believe their genitals need ‘reshaping’,
  • Teach your daughter to shut up and take it,
  • Say a child who was disowned or beaten or raped by a parent
  • Was being difficult or needs to understand the parent’s point of view,
  • Smoke, drink or do drugs during pregnancy,
  • Walk out on them because you didn’t get on with the ex,
  • Think it’s the school’s job to teach them not yours,
  • Think more expensive schools = better education
  • Or money & gifts make up for your absence,
  • Beat your kid for speaking to elders or looking them in the eye,
  • Beat them to toughen them up,
  • Would rescue your baby from a building on fire
  • And leave someone else’s to burn,
  • Have kids with someone of a different background
  • So they don’t look too much like you,
  • Think boys should be dominant and girls dominated,
  • Would terminate a foetus on account of its sex,
  • Let them learn about sex from school, media & porn first,
  • Think your son acts unmanly
  • Or your daughter acts unfeminine,
  • Would kill them to protect your honour,

You are a shit parent.

Yes I am condemning

And I did warn you.

Yes I am naming and shaming

And I did warn you.

Yes I am inviting you to hate the fuck out of me

But before you do that

Check yourselves.

What are you guilty of?

What are you guilty of?

What are you guilty of?

 

© One Tawny Stranger, May 2016

Motherly Hate/ Love

Two young mothers.

Nisansala broke her virginity at 25

With the man she crowned her king bee,

She took him inside her warm throbbing hive walls,

He buzzed with animal excitement,

She & he serenaded away,

Foreplayed their way

To on top, underneath, on top, underneath each other

Spinning into a new orbit above the Earth’s atmosphere.

She stained the moon yellow with her sweet sticky juices,

That’s why it’s called a honeymoon.

Nicola’s virginity was broken at 16

By the man her parents wanted as her lawful wedded,

Slicking the bedsheets crimson

As he appointed himself to missionary,

She froze in position,

He charged in with red flag waving,

She mutilated the alarm bells in her head.

Two minutes later

She raised the blood-white flag to signal surrender.

It wasn’t rape because he didn’t consent either,

Fulfilling God’s command to go forth and multiply

Is a necessary evil

– he reminds her to remind herself.

When Nisansala had her daughter

She taught her to know her place –

Not just the kitchen but the whole house,

Not just the house but the whole planet,

Not just the planet but the whole universe

– And beyond if it couldn’t house her greatness.

Her son’s masculinity was only under threat

When his classmates called him and his sister freaks.

He thought it common sense that

Girls had brains,

Boys had beauty,

Women were rational

And men were emotional!

They both had a strong drive

So Nisansala nitro fuelled their mental engines,

Smashed out red & amber so the lights would stay green

To turn misogyny into roadkill

On the race to a sexually equal future.

When Nicola looked at her daughter for the first time

She saw Genesis on replay,

A soul as crooked as a rib sending humanity straight to Hell.

She prayed for permission to sacrifice her only begotten son

So that all may be saved

Yet her Lord had said “Thou shalt not kill”

So maternity was Nicola’s cross to bear.

To other wives and mothers she was a martyr,

To her children’s emotional needs, she was just a breathing corpse.

The daughter was taught to quarantine herself from the contagion of a man’s touch

Yet submit to The Father’s will when he breached her.

Each day the son failed to find his mother’s soul

He scored a new line onto his wrists

And when there were too many failed attempts to keep score of

He thought it’s time to aim a bit higher.

aim a bit hgher